Monday, January 2, 2017

Five Problems I had with Rogue One

New Year and New Me!  Supposedly, at least.  My New Years' resolution is to catch up on the things that I've missed. One of the most important things I needed to catch up on was finally seeing Rogue One: A Star Wars Story. I know, I know, it is long overdue.  So, I woke up early on January 1st to greet 2017, grabbed my breakfast candy, and headed to the first screening of the morning. 

Wow, Rogue One was a fucking fantastic film.  I truly enjoyed it.  It just worked so damn well. It gave fan service without being overbearing, added new info and depth to a world we already knew, and gave us plenty of action.  Frankly, it succeeded in every place The Force Awakens failed miserably.  

That being said, we both know you've seen the title of this post.  No movie is perfect, with the notable exception of the 1987 Masters of the Universe live action film. That movie is perfection incarnate and no one will ever change my mind.  I had five issues with the movie.  All of them are small issues, with only two barely relating to the plot and two relating to the credits.  So really, I'm practically nitpicking.  I leave these complaints to you, dear reader, to decide if they have merit. 

My 5 Rogue One Issues

1. Tarkin looked creepy because he looked realistic but not as creepy as Leia did though.  Admittedly, watching this after Carrie Fisher's passing didn't help my feelings. Despite that, I am definitely not a fan of this new technology. It opens too many distasteful options for already greedy movie executives while robbing the actual actors of credit.  I'll take this back if you can tell me from memory who actually played the body of Tarkin and Leia in this film.  Hmmm? That's what I thought. 

2. General Raddus, a fish-related character, having a "Hammerhead corvette" is speciest.  Seriously, it's just too easy, and predictable.  It rings as very stereotypical fish and what could you expect when they name the species Mon Calamari. And the fact that I recognized that is why I'm a Star Trek fan. 

3. I dislike watching a movie where I'm rooting for all the main characters to die to keep good continuity through the series.  And yes, there was a chance they survive only to be ignored for the entirety of the trilogy but that option also sucks.  Sometimes, I don't want to know how it ends. 

4.  I hate the closing credits.  The person who spaced them out like a Windows 95 word document should be fired, and perhaps shot.  (Side Note: I am apparently the only person who noticed this, and still don't think I'm being too picky.  Everyone else needs better standards.)

5. I saw mentions of Peter Cushing's estate and Carrie Fisher in the special thanks section of the credits.  I understand that is for the use of their creepy younger selves (see #1 for explanation).  Still, I'm a little surprised and disappointed that no mention of Kenny Baker was made.  He passed away in 2016 before this was released and R2-D2 was in the film.  Yes, he isn't a must-to-have that character but Baker brought life to that little droid. A dedication or at least a thanks would have been tasteful.  

Happy New Year and always remember, "I am one with the Force. The Force is with me."

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